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* It's here! I've just released a brand new software title I've developed for the Parson Place Software Creations collection. If you're looking for an easy-to-use computer program that enables folks with little or no HTML coding knowledge to create their own web pages in a snap, then Page Pump 2.0 is just what you've been waiting for. More advanced HTML programmers can also use it to create their own web pages quickly and easily. All you have to do is type your web document's text, then point and click on the command buttons to automatically create your web pages. Read more about it now!
* Get your Parson Place Specialty Bookmarks now! They're beautifully designed and make an excellent accessory to any book, including The Holy Bible. These will make excellent Christmas gifts to accentuate any books you give for Christmas, too. Remember -- you get FREE shipping on all bookmark orders!
* Are you looking for great software at affordable prices? Broderbund Software has just what you're seeking, a wide variety of titles, including educational, games, business, and professional. See what they have to offer!
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Reverend Fun's Weekly Cartoon!
Diary Circumstances
A little boy asked his mother, "What's that you're reading?"
A diary.
What's in it?
I can't tell you that. A diary is a highly personal and confidential affair; It has important secret dreams and secret yearnings. It's private. It's not meant to be shared with other people. And besides, this diary belongs to your sister.
*Thanks to Pastor Tim for this joke!*
Pastor Tim's CleanLaugh
The Porpoise
A research group on sea mammals captured a rather odd porpoise on one of its trips. Its peculiarity was that it had feet. After they had photographed and measured the poor thing, they prepared to set it free.
"Wait a minute," said one of the researchers, "Wouldn't it be a kindness if our ship's doctor here were to amputate the feet so that it would be like other porpoises?"
"Not on your life," exclaimed the doctor, "That would be defeeting the porpoise."
*Thanks to Pastor Tim for this joke!*
http://www.cybersalt.org/cleanlaugh
Superstition
There was a case in one hospital's Intensive Care ward where patients always died in the same bed, on Sunday morning, at about 11 a.m.,regardless of their medical condition.
This puzzled the doctors and some even thought that it had something to do with the supernatural. No one could solve the mystery as to why the deaths occurred around 11 a.m. on Sundays.
So a world-wide team of experts was assembled to investigate the cause of the incidents. The next Sunday morning, a few minutes before 11 a.m., all doctors and nurses nervously wait outside the ward to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding wooden crosses, prayer books and other holy objects to ward off the evil spirits.
Just when the clock struck 11... Pookie Johnson, The part-time Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and unplugged the life support system so that he could use the vacuum cleaner.
*Thanks to Pastor Tim for this joke!*
http://www.cybersalt.org/cleanlaugh
Stern Announcement
During a sermon one Sunday, the pastor heard two teenage girls in the back giggling and disturbing people.
He interrupted his sermon and announced sternly, "There are two of you here who have not heard a word I've said." That quieted them down.
When the service was over, he went to greet people at the front door. Three different adults apologized for going to sleep in church, promising it would never happen again.
*Thanks to Pastor Tim for this joke!*
http://www.cybersalt.org/cleanlaugh
Sunday School Lessons by Rev. Walter Albritton
This is a weekly instruction by Rev. Walter Albritton. Visit the Alabama-West Florida United Methodist Conference (AWFUMC) web site to read the most current one. To find out more about his inspirational writings and Christian ministry, visit Brother Walter's web site.
The Parson's Ponderings: Transitions
by Rev. Michael L. White
Autumn is here, and the memory of this past summer is fading fast. Spring and summer, my two favorite seasons of the year, seem to pass by faster and faster with every year. Nevertheless, there is much that I love about autumn and winter, too. The crispness of the air and the beautiful coloring of the leaves are but two of those things. Baked turkey, sumptious dressing, and delicious desserts are a few others. I can hardly wait!
Life is about transition. The changing seasons reflect that, and the events of our lives reflect that. As I prepare to transition from life in the Army to civilian life once again, I am more aware of that fact than ever. What I will transition into, and how smoothly it will happen, is still a bit of a mystery, but I trust that God has a Divine Plan and is working in the midst of my life to bring it to pass. My prayerful desire is that I will yield to His Will for me, rather than insisting on my own way.
Will you pray with and for me that this will be the case? I greatly desire your prayers in this regard, and I welcome your words of support and encouragement, too. Until next time, I hope you will enjoy the festivities of fall as much as I expect to do. May God bless you richly!
Agape Press News (Top Christian news headlines)
Christian News and Commentary at Cross Walk
Maranatha Christian Journal
Read all the current Christian news headlines at MCJ Online.
Praize News (Top Christian news headlines from the Praize Christian Network)
Religion News Service
Read the latest press releases from various religious groups.
Voice of the Martyrs Newsletter
(Keep abreast of the latest reports of persecution of Christians all around the world.)
World Net Daily (Extensive news from all around the world.)
Read Breakpoint commentaries on the Breakpoint web site. Breakpoint is a daily (M-F) radio and email commentary by Chuck Colson. They are always insightful, thought-provoking, and very apropos to our times.
Listen to Breakpoint commentaries from the Breakpoint web site (in real audio format - works with Windows Media Player and RealOne Player).
Holidays this month: Columbus Day (10 October, in the USA) and Halloween (31 October)
All links open in a new window.
Columbus Day
Features useful information significant to the observance of Columbus Day in the USA.
Halloween
A secular perspective on the origin and customs of Halloween.
A Man in Need of Prayer
Here's a stirring call to prayer for someone we will all recognize.
Microsoft's Malicious Software Removal Tool
If you fear your computer may have a virus, you now have the option of letting Microsoft check your PC from their Web site, or, if that fails, you can download the malicious software removal tool from their Web site and run it from your own computer. Either way, the tool checks your PC for malicious software, such as viruses, and removes them for you.
The Christian Web Site Newsletter
For a complete list of current new additions, go to:
http://www.ChristianWebSite.com/search/New/
The Internet for Christians Newsletter
(read it online!)
Well, that does it for this issue! I hope you found something useful to share with others. You are welcome to share this newsletter with whomever, but PLEASE DON'T SPAM ANYONE with it.
God willing, I'll greet you again next month with another collection of the best of my Internet experience. May God bless you!
IHS,
mike
Michael L. White
Email: info@parsonplace.com
Web Site: http://www.parsonplace.com
Sue's Open-Hearted Suggestions for Writers Newsletter Reaching the world for Christ through writing-- Visit Write4Christ.com where you will find free and inexpensive tools to help you in your journey of Web Evangelism. Sign up for the monthly newsletter. |
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